How To Keep The Flame Burning Over The Holidays
The holiday season can be a stressful time for many couples, so check out Dr. Jess’ tips to help keep your flame burning as your ring in the new year.
Forego Gift-Giving
Good things may come in small packages, but great things come in the form of our most valuable asset…time. The pressure to choose the perfect gift can detract from the cheer of the season, so trade in time at the mall for quality time spent together.
Take turns planning an intimate date and use these ideas as inspiration:
Go ice skating hand-in-hand.
Hit up the tobogganing hill beneath the stars.
Prepare a private brunch for two.
Indulge in a spa day.
Take a holiday cooking class together.
Snuggle up for an evening of spiked hot cocoa and cheesy holiday movies.
Go snow tubing!
Volunteer at a local soup kitchen or “adopt”’ a child and purchase holiday gifts from their wish list.
“Match” Your Family Time
The holidays usually involve a series of...
Doggy Style: 5 New Takes On An Old Position
Who says you can’t teach an old dog new tricks?
When it comes to sex positions, the possibilities are endless! However, even the most creative among us tend to fall into a routine, so sometimes we need a little inspiration to spice things up.
If you’re in need of a bit of inspiration, check out these hot position variations to take your tried and trusted doggie style to a whole new level.
First…The Classic Doggy Style
She gets on her hands and knees and he slides in from behind. That’s it folks!
Pile High Variation
Pile pillows beneath her hips to change her pelvic angle and stimulate her G-Spot and A-Spot from behind. She can lean forward onto her elbows and arch her back to give her butt a little extra POP!
Good Doggie Variation
He takes total control and grabs her by the forearms or wrists, so that she rests on her knees, but her torso is still almost parallel to the mattress. She submits to his dominance as he thrusts and rocks in perfect...
Is Shopping Together Good For Your Sex Life?
Researchers claim that shopping can be just as exciting as sex, as stumbling upon a great deal causes a powerful endorphin rush that rivals sexual arousal. Seriously?
A dispassionate shopper, I am reluctant to buy the theory that that a hot deal can leave you overcome with climactic excitement. I adore my sky-high heels and appreciate their role in the bedroom, but I cannot imagine getting that worked up in the mall.
Shopping expert, Tamika Auwai of Shop Socials sees things differently and invited me to attend her sold-out event, TEN, at the Spoke Club to observe the connection between intimacy and shopping in the flesh. This cocktail-friendly experience included some of the hottest designers in Canada and I was immediately taken aback by the number of couples who attended hand-in-hand. Perhaps it was the exclusive venue or the melange of booze and design, but the event was packed and love was in the air.
Guests were eager to explain the connection between shopping and intimacy and...
Dirty Talk Lines You Can Use Tonight!
In my last post, we covered the basics of dirty talk and they are well worth reviewing if you missed them. As promised, I’ve listed some specific dirty talk lines you can use to woo, taunt, tease or tantalize your sweetie without feeling embarrassed or tongue-tied.
Romantic and Sweet:
•You’re everything I’ve ever dreamed of.
•I can’t imagine making love to anyone else.
•You’re my dream guy.
•I never want any other c*ck inside of me.
Alluring and Teasing:
•I know you want what’s under this shirt.
•Want to come play with me?
•Make my thighs wet!
•I’ll do whatever you tell me to do.
Aggressive:
•I’m going to hold you down and make you come.
•Can you handle what I’m about to do?
Responsive:
•Tell me how you like it.
•What can I do for you?
•I’m just going to lay back and let you work me over.
Ego Stroking:
•You’re the best I’ve ever had.
•You make me so...
How To Talk Dirty: Part 2
Continued from Part 1...
If you want to take it up a notch, consider telling your partners about the fantasies you have that include them. Tell them that you thought of them earlier in the day and started aching to feel their touch or tell them that you saw someone else checking them out and it turned you on. You might tell them that you were watching them work, bend over or get undressed and it made you tingle in all the right places.
Be honest with regard to your fantasies and remember that fantasies do not need to become reality. Just because you are willing to talk about filming your sexual escapades because it turns you on while you are having sex does not mean that you need to pursue this fantasy in real life. If you find that you are turned on by talking about a fantasy, but draw the line at talk alone, make this clear in advance. It is important to set boundaries before sex play and debrief after sex to discuss how you feel about the things that were said.
Other...
How To Talk Dirty: Part 1
Of all the workshops I teach, Dirty Talk, is among my favourites! I promise clients that if they learn to talk dirty, they can be the laziest lovers and still blow their partners’ minds. This is because dirty talk is all about learning to tap into your most intense fantasies and bring them to life in words. And since fantasy is often hotter than reality, crawling into your partner’s dirty mind is the key to a long-lasting and fulfilling sexual relationship.
Many people learn to talk dirty from porn, but this leaves them with a limited repertoire that excludes the personal element of sexy talk. Moreover, dirty talk doesn’t have to be rough, hardcore or even sexual to be erotic. The most enticing bedroom chatter can be romantic, teasing, alluring, demanding, submissive, naughty and fantastical.
Follow these guidelines to get started and be sure to check back next week for some explicit one-liners you can use to develop your dirty talk arsenal:
The first...
How to Get What You Want
“I’ll never have a sexual life like other women.”
“I’m too wounded to have a good sexual life or relationship.”
“It’s just not in the cards for me.”
“Everyone else is fixable—but me.”
“My perfect relationship just doesn’t exist.”
I hear these things all the time from people—women, especially. People often go to a place of disbelief about having what they really desire because on some level it’s safer to believe they just can’t have it. If they just accept that they can’t really have what they want, they don’t have to do anything different, challenge themselves anew and risk the possibility of it being true. So they just decide it’s inevitable.
It’s only true if you believe it to be.
You create your life, every minute of every day.
This scarcity belief is a way to protect the self from further hurt and it keeps you small. If this sounds like you or...
George Clooney: I Never Want to Get Married Again
I woke up yesterday morning to a news story about George Clonney possibly being single and once again his beliefs on marriage came under fire. George married Talia Balsam in 1989 and they were divorced in 1993. After their split, he said he would never marry again. This is always a hot topic with media and this belief can rub people the wrong way. But here is the thing: he said he was never going to marry again -- not that he was never going to commit to someone else or be in a relationship ever again. Here is the other thing: he might also be happy the way he is. Should we be calling him a forever- playboy or perhaps acknowledging that he is brave enough to work out what he wants in life and stand up for it publicly.
We live in a society that puts so much emphasis on marriage as the ultimate happiness. But for some couples (some who have been together for quite some time), marriage can come with a lot of unwanted pressure that wreaks havoc on the relationship. If someone does...
The Work Husband: Harmless Fun Or Something More?
Having a close ally at work can create a more productive work environment, increase job satisfaction and motivate you to spend more time at the office. This may explain why 65 per cent of professionals admit to having a work spouse, a non-competitive business companion with whom you share everything work related...and sometimes more.
The concept of a work spouse goes beyond having a friendly co-worker with similar interests. Chemistry is what separates your your work friends from the special connection you share with your work spouse. You click in a unique way with this person and feel comfortable expressing a range of emotions including some degree of vulnerability. You’re attracted to them on several levels and though the appeal may not be sexual from the onset, many admit that it often develops into physical desire. Work spouses also give you an ego boost, a dose of excitement and a sense of being appreciated for who you are as opposed to what you do.
If you respect and...
Stuck In A Sex Slump?
Sex is a vital component of a healthy relationship. Aside from the (hopefully) mutual enjoyment it provides, sex also releases a flood of powerful neurochemicals that cause you to feel closer to your partner. Great sex can relieve stress, break tension, and facilitate recovery after a big fight.
It’s easy to have frequent, passionate sex early on, but what about when sex dries up a bit as the relationship becomes long term?
Running errands, catching up on work, and other activities that are part of the daily grind can interfere with time normally reserved for romance. This often leaves women feeling neglected and men feeling sexually frustrated, although these feelings are by no means gender exclusive.
I frequently receive emails from guys who can’t explain the sexual slump they’re in. Women reach out and tell me they don’t quite know why, but they don’t feel the same passion, the same spark they used to feel.
It boils down to a case of he-says-she-says....
