Tips for feeling better about your body after cancer:

Feeling great about our bodies is no easy task and negative perceptions of the way we look run rampant among all women. Add the side-effects of chemo, radiation, surgeries, drugs and medical probing into the mix and it’s no surprise that most women diagnosed with cancer also struggle to love and embrace their bodies.

But body image is less about the way you look and more about the way you feel about your body. It is a core component of self-worth and impacts the ways in which we relate to ourselves and others. It is also key to sexual functioning and positive body image is  positively correlated with levels of desire, orgasm and sexual satisfaction.

An overwhelming number of women living with cancer diagnoses report a decline in sexual desire and many connect body image issues with this side effect. And while sex may be the farthest thing from your mind during treatment and recovery, feeling as comfortable and...

Continued from Part 1 here...

3. Minimize Negative Triggers

We all have our ups and downs and it would be futile to attempt to eliminate all sources of negativity. However we can minimize exposure to unnecessary triggers that tend to promote a less than positive attitude toward our bodies.

If certain social circles, individuals, television shows or even social media updates leave you feeling inadequate, you may want to reframe or reconsider how often you embrace these connections. Surrounding yourself with people who focus on their positive attributes while acknowledging that their body is only one component of their whole selves will help you to do the same. 

4. Accept a Little Jealousy!

In our culture, we tend to view jealousy as unconditionally negative. It is often dismissed as a sign of weakness or low self-esteem when this is not always the case. In fact, we all experience some feelings of jealousy and since it is
difficult (near-impossible) to directly control our ...

This month is all about Do-It-Yourself and as fantastic as some of the latest homemade crafts and edible gifts may be, I cannot think of a better project to work on with your very own hands than a little self-pleasure.

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With new research suggesting that over 90 percent of men and women have made solo sex a part of their erotic repertoire, there is hope that the days of shame, stigma and shameful hairy palm myths are long gone. Considering that most people will experience their very first orgasm at the hands of...their own hands, it’s a good thing too! Read on for my favourite tips to get the most out of self-love.

Fantasize!

Thinking about someone other than the love of your life during sex is NOT tantamount to cheating. In fact, 84 percent of men and women admit to fantasizing about other partners and research suggests that those who fantasize have the most fulfilling sex lives. So go ahead and let your mind wander a little...

If you don’t know what to...

Kinky Sex 101

BDSM describes sexual play that involves some exchange of power or pain. B stands for bondage, D stands for dominance and/or discipline, S stands for sadism (pleasure associated with inflicting pain) and/or submission and M stands for masochism (pleasure associated with receiving pain). Sometimes the terms are grouped together in pairs with BD referring to bondage and discipline, DS standing for dominance and submission, and SM referring to sado-masochism.

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While BDSM encompasses a wide range of sexual activities, practitioners tend to play complementary roles that involve some degree of power differentials. However, activities are underscored by the consent of all parties involved and BDSM can be a part of healthy, normal and safer sex play.

Playing out sexual fantasies can be a great way to explore new role-play identities and it is not uncommon for powerful and dominant people to enjoy being submissive during sex play. The desire to engage in elements of...

The following is an excerpt from Dr. Jess’ best-selling book, Hot Sex Tips, Tricks and Licks.

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Technique #1: Take My Breath Away

Want to get her all hot and primed for an orgasm that tingles all over? Then take a page out of the ancient sex text, The Kama Sutra, and blow oh-so-gentle kisses her way until she’s begging for more. It may be hard to resist putting your wet puckered lips against her glistening skin, but a little bit of teasing can go a long way and it will be well worth it in the end.

Positioning:

Ask her to lie on her stomach in the Face Down, Bum Up! position so that you’re able to get between her thighs.

Technique:

• Get your lips nice and wet so that she can feel the warm moisture approaching her skin.
• Start by blowing gentle kisses all over her left outer foot and ankle bringing your lips as close to her skin as possible without making contact.
• Be sure to let out a gentle breath as you kiss so that she can feel your warmth and desire.
• ...

An excerpt from Dr. Jess’ best-seller, Hot Sex Tips, Tricks and Licks.

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Flirting is one of the most fundamental human behaviors and each of us is hard-wired to seduce prospective partners with flirtatious gestures and expressions. When you first meet, the flirting meter flies off the charts, but this sexy courting ritual wanes with time and can easily disappear even in loving relationships. This can be catastrophic, as evolutionary psychologists believe that flirting with your own partner is actually a genetic survival tactic. Translation? Flirting leads to more sex!

Here are a few flirting tips to take your prolonged foreplay to new heights:

Touch! Brush your hand against your lover’s thigh in non-sexual situations to make the blood rush to their pelvic region and give them a taste of what’s to come later on. This isn’t a commitment to “have sex” when you get home, but just a reminder that your attraction to them is still red-hot.

Be...

I hate putting on a bathing suit. It’s irrational, to some extent, but very real. I am not alone. I don’t know very many women – over the age of 21 anyway – who like to be seen in their bathing suits. It’s scary. It’s the most surefire way to feel badly about yourself. It’s filled with the anxiety of “stacking up,” of being “hot,” of looking how the media tells you that beautiful women look. After all, you NEVER see “normal” women in bathing suit ads, calendars, movies etc….

I’m not an all-encompassing media blamer. There’s more to it than that. We are reflective creatures. Long before we had mirrors and mass media, I’m betting that we looked to the reaction of others to know whether we were beautiful or not. And I’m betting that when someone else got all the attention, we interpreted it as a personal short coming. Even those of us who claim not to.

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When my friend...

You may already be a seasoned pro between the sheets, but even an old dog can learn a few new tricks. After all, I’ve been studying human sexuality (formally) for the past twelve years and I learn something new each and every day. Lucky me!

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It is my pleasure to share one of my favourite moves, the Pinch N Groove, which receives rave reviews from my clients across the globe…

Begin by riling her up with the Pussy Pocket. This easy move is a great warm-up technique, but it can also be used to take her over the edge as you increase the speed, pressure and grinding. Simply cup your warm hand over her Venus mound pressing your palm against her mound and curling your fingers down over her vulva. Press your fingers against her gradually increasing the intensity by pulsing, rubbing and undulating your entire hand over her most sensitive region.

Once her hips start to thrust and her breath rate increases, have her lean back against the headboard with her legs...

Often times, clients come to me (particularly moms) without any ability to connect with their lower abdominals. When an area of our body feels dormant or hard to connect with, this can sometimes mean that that corresponding chakra needs some energy brought into the area. The sacral chakra is about feeling and sexuality and is located right around the lower abs. Visit this site to read more.

Any exercise that helps stimulate the lower abs can be a great way to bring your sexuality back to life and bring new energy into the area, clearing out stagnation.

There are some go to exercises I love for getting these muscle fibres more alive.

To get your started, I'm going to suggest the towel squeeze tail bone lift exercise. Many people who haven't been able to fire these lower tummy muscle fibres find this fool proof! I've had people swear they haven't been able to feel this area work in any exercises or with lots of coaching in the past and finally feel their lower tummies alive again.

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I've become more and more interested in somatization as I try to unravel people's physical issues. Before I continue, here's a bit more info.

Somatization disorder is a long-term (chronic) condition in which a person has physical symptoms that involve more than one part of the body, but no physical cause can be found.

The pain and other symptoms people with this disorder feel are real, and are not created or faked on purpose (malingering).

The disorder usually begins before age 30 and occurs more often in women than in men. The disorder is more common in people with irritable bowel syndrome and chronic pain.

In the past, this disorder was thought to be related to emotional stress. The pain was dismissed as being "all in their head."

However, patients who have a somatization disorder seem to experience pain or other symptoms in a way that increases the level of pain. Pain and worry create a cycle that is hard to break.

People who have a history of physical or sexual abuse are more...