Spank that monkey. Rub that rascal. Stroke that sweet spot.

Masturbation. Whatever you do and whatever you call it, know that you’re perfectly normal and there is no shame in a little self pleasure!

via GIPHY

I receive so many emails from concerned masturbators who fear that their solo sex sessions are inherently deviant and will inevitably lead to sexual and/or health problems. However, nothing could be farther from the truth. In fact, touching yourself for sexual pleasure can be good for you!

Here are a few reasons to DIY:

It just might be good for your health Studies suggest that sexual pleasure, both partnered and solo, is linked with positive health outcomes including improved prostate health, heightened immunity and better circulation.

It can make partnered sex more pleasurable Most of us agree that you have to love yourself before you can open up to being loved by another and the same principles apply to sex. Masturbation not only offers an opportunity to discover new...

Discovering lube as a grown-up is like discovering what your clit does as a kid. "Who," you think, "was the brilliant mind behind this idea? And why did I not know about this sooner? Why did I memorize the quadratic equation in high school, but not hear a word about this vastly more life-improving substance?" Below you will find an introduction to this lovely stuff.

Because without changing any other single thing that you do in your sex life, you will completely change the feel of most of the things you're already doing. Ever had a hard time coming because the friction of your hand on your clit left you less than excited? Ever been enjoying a nice long round of intercourse only to be stopped short by irritation? Ever ended up with a raw penis after a vigorous jerk-off session? **Ever had a condom break?** Lube, lube, lube, lube.

But not every lube is ideal for every person or every situation. Each lube has a main ingredient, and each has pros and cons. Some lubes are better for anal...

Do you get frustrated when your he leaves his towel on the floor over and over again? Does it bother you when she forgets to buy milk for the fifth time? It's normal in a relationship to get frustrated by the small bad habits of your partner. This frustration, however, can sometimes grow to the point where it affects larger aspects of your relationship such as your sex life. To stop this from happening, here's a tip to help you not sweat the small stuff:

Think of your partner like a piece of meat! 

Anytime you encounter a small thing your partner has done that frustrates you (ie. left the toilet seat up, left the oven on, etc), try to think of your carnal attraction to your partner. Think of your partner like a piece of meat and focus on one part of him or her that you think is absolutely sexy. This thought doesn't necessarily have to lead to sex - it simply helps you forget about the petty issue and remember what you love about your partner.

Dr. Jess passed through Grande Prairie last week to participate in HIV North Society's 25th anniversary! She met with a great group of enthusiastic community members and shared insights on everything from healthy relationships to the mysterious G-Spot. Check out some of the pics below!

These lovely ladies (all co-workers) made Dr. Jess' event at Ovations Theatre a "work night" out!

Jared Gossen, Team Lead of HIV/North Society & Amanda, Street Nurse, pose for a quick shot!

Brittney (RN) taught Dr. Jess a thing or two about childbirth and the female anatomy...

Dr. Jess poses with another fun workshop participant.

What a novel concept! Amid the hustle, bustle and stress of the Edmonton airport, a pianist offers some soothing sounds...

Check out what the Daily Herald Tribune had to say about Dr. Jess' event:

Renowned Sexologist Takes The Stage Monday

By Caryn Ceolin

"Dirty talk won’t happen just in the bedroom, Monday evening.

HIV...

I wouldn’t wish being 24 on anyone: it’s an age wrought with complete confusion, desperation, irresponsibility, raging hormones and being completely broke. The only thing worse than being in your early to mid twenties is being in your early to mid twenties in the dating world.

We all have to jitter our way through our twenties eventually, and my only hope is to make it out fairly unscathed. That hasn’t quite been the case thus far, so as I approach turning 25 in a month and a half, I am praying the latter half of this decade is (slightly) less of a vodka-induced haze with a side of heartbreak.

Not only have I endured my own dating nightmares, I also have the pleasure of being the resident pseudo-psychiatrist amongst my group of friends, which allows me to experience by proxy the horrors I haven’t had the pleasure of weathering. Along the way I have managed to compile a small but valuable collection of knowledge about the complete chaos that is the dating...

We here at Sex with Dr. Jess recently became acquainted with Mary Anne Marlow, author of Pursue to Paradise.  Mary has devoted many years of her life to learning Tantric methods of sacred union. Naturally, we wanted Mary Anne's help to introduce you, the readers, to the Lifestyle of Tantra. Here is what she had to share with us:

How did you first come to know the "Lifestyle of Tantra"?

It was well over 10 years ago, while living in the arms of paradise in Costa Rica, where I was introduced to the “Lifestyle of Tantra”. A couple that I regularly provided Aromatherapy massage to owned a B & B Tantra Retreat and together, they were disciplined in the sacred practices of the Eastern Tantra/Tao Philosophies.  One aspect of that lifestyle was exercising healthy intimate meditations of sexual energy.  Following this; I took it upon myself to fine-tune techniques learned through the writings of Mantak Chia & other various masters.

What is the...

We recently sat down with Telisha Ng, commonly known as the Goddess Intellect. Telisha is a relationship coach and well-known blogger. With so many readers asking us common questions about communication and intimacy in relationships, we thought we'd pass them along to none other than the Goddess Intellect herself. Here's what Telisha had to tell us:

1. When it comes to sex and relationships, what is the most common mistake we make as couples and how can we fix it?

The most common mistake couples make in relationships is that we often expect our partners to know how to meet our needs at all times. I think that the assumption that we only need to communicate our needs once and never again is how we develop resentment and hurt feelings in relationships. The best way to fix this is to keep communication flowing and constant, taking the time to listen to each other and to the meaning behind the words and actions. Never be afraid to express when you have been hurt or when you feel pleased...

Right after Dr. Jess' trip to The Calgary Taboo Show, she headed to Edmonton for round two! The blanket of snow over Edmonton was truly a beautiful sight, and Jess was just as dazzled by all the exciting products, people and performances at The Edmonton Taboo Show. Thanks to companies like The Traveling Tickle Trunk and Passion Parties, there was never a dull moment! And thanks to Maple Leaf Fudge, Jess was always well-fed! Check out all the kinky, fun photos from The Edmonton Taboo Show below.

Dr. Jess tries her hand (and feet) at walking on the "human carpet". Each and every day offers a new learning opportunity...

The amazing "human carpet!"

Bondage fun at the Edmonton Taboo Show.

Apparently, Dr. Jess really enjoyed that "human carpet!"

Jess had a blast sharing 10 Steps to Hotter Sex on behalf of Desire Resorts

Beautiful Violet '420' Vega.

Visiting the Passion Parties booth

Passion Parties is a great company for all your sexy, in-home party needs!

Dr. Jess...

Have you had casual sex in the past week? Month? Year? How did it compare to the sex you've had with a long-term partner? Chances are, it wasn't quite as good. But what classifies as a "good" or "successful" casual encounter?

A recent article published in the Globe and Mail reports new research findings indicating that women are less likely to orgasm during casual sex than in intercourse during a serious relationship. My question is: Is this news? The answer: Not exactly.

As the article states, "Like generations before them, many young women […] are finding that casual sex does not bring the physical pleasure men more often experience." What is news, however, is the way in which women are embracing casual sex. Despite both their statistical misfortune with regards to "the big O" and the relentless one-sided gender, women seem to be opening their minds to the idea of a casual hookup now more than ever. This in no way means women are more "slutty" than ever. Research simply...

You’ve read Fifty Shades of Grey, taken a few good sex workshops and experimented with blindfolds, restraints and hot wax. But have you taken the time to discuss the concept of R.A.C.K with your lover(s)? If so, we’d love to hear your thoughts. If not, please read through this non-exhaustive explanation and consider talking to your partner(s) about what kinky sex means to you.

The following is an excerpt from my new book, The Little Book of Kink:

R.A.C.K. stands for risk-aware, consensual kink and this basic phrase outlines two of the essential components of kink while recognizing that there is some risk inherent to all sex play.

For kinky sex to be considered risk-aware, all parties involved must understand and acknowledge the potential negative outcomes of the proposed activity. These risks are ideally discussed ahead of time -- not in the heat of the moment when sexual tension is already building. It is important to address the measures you plan to take to minimize...