World renowned relationship expert and best-selling author, Jessica O’Reilly, has signed on as Desire Resorts’ official sexologist. You may know Dr. Jess from PlayboyTV’s Swing, ABC Spark’s Love Trap or from the pages of Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health and Men’s Fitness, but she is also a huge fan of Desire Resorts. “This is one of the most exciting collaborations for the Dr. Jess brand and also one of the most obvious. Desire Resorts provide the perfect environment for couples to reconnect, both practically and intimately, so I’ve been sending couples to their facilities for years. I know from personal experience that even a few days at one of their resorts can completely transform a relationship.”

Dr. Jess first arrived at Desire Riviera Maya as a guest in 2006 and in 2008, she hosted her first couples’ workshop onsite. She now facilitates retreats, workshops and seminars at both locations several times per year. Her...

Continued from Part I

I describe some starter techniques below, but you can play with them to make them your own:

The Firestarter

Lube up both palms and gently rub them over the shaft of the penis as though you are warming your hands over the fire. Lube is essential to this technique, so be generous in your application. Breathe gently on his lubricated shaft to produce a tingling sensation.

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The Basic Grip

Use your non-dominant hand to grip the base of the penis by forming a tight okay sign using your index finger and thumb. This can function like a cock ring to trap blood in the penis and intensify sensation. Use the other lubricated hand to stroke up and down the shaft and apply pressure to the ridge and the frenulum.

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The Other Woman

This is the backhand grip. Turn your dominant hand upside down as though you are signalling a thumbs-down sign. Stroke up and down the shaft to offer a varied sensation from the traditional grip.

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The Multi-Tasker

Use...

This post is intended for readers over the age of 18.

Hand jobs are not just for teenagers. Though I've written about the art of sensuous touch in the past, each time I visit Desire Resort and Spa, I pick up a few new tricks from the very adventurous and experienced couples who attend my workshops. I thought I'd post a few thoughts on how to make the most of lending a hand in the bedroom, at the theatre or under the restaurant table. (Please abide by local laws.)

As always, I'll preface this post by reminding readers that every guy is different (even if they all seem the same), so there are no sure-fire ways to bring him to the heights ecstasy. All I can offer are a few techniques to get you started. You can practice on a carrot or other vegetable, but don't get too hung up on technique. I always tell my workshops participants to do what feels good for them as opposed to focusing on my instructions. If you "screw up" and twist to the left instead of the right, don't worry about it...

Clients are often looking for sure-fire ways to bring their partners to mind-blowing, earth-shattering orgasms. And though a quick survey of women's and men's magazine covers may suggest otherwise, there are no guaranteed tricks that will work each and every time for each and every person.

Each person's body is unique and our erogenous zones vary not only from person to person but from day to day. What works on Monday afternoon in the backseat of your car may do nothing for you on a Saturday night after enjoying a bottle of wine in front of a flickering fireplace. And it goes without saying that while one partner may scream with joy at nice lubed finger in the bum, the same move might send another partner screaming and running for the hills.

Having said that, part of my work as a sexologist involves sharing techniques to help clients get started on their own journey of exploration and experimentation. Here are a few thoughts to inspire your own sexual voyage across the beautiful...

Stop Here for Better Orgasms

In my private practice, I receive many inquiries from men asking for advice on how to last longer in bed. And though most women I talk to aren't looking for marathon-length sessions, we do appreciate the option to take our time and enjoy the experience. Learning to control your orgasm (for both men and women) is not only empowering, but can deepen sexual and orgasmic response. This is the first in a three-part mini series on making sex last longer.

The Stop-Start Method is a simple, sensual and orgasm-intensifying approach to lasting longer in bed. It simply entails doing whatever you love to do and stopping just before the point-of-no-return (or the point of ejaculatory inevitability for men). You don't have to stop stimulating your partner or yourself, but do stop performing the particular activity that makes you feel like cumming.

For example, if you're having penetrative intercourse, pull out (or have your partner pull out) and engage in some breast...

Here are a few general tips from the Fun With Fellatio session below...

• Change positions often to avoid cramping, vary your angle of contact and alter sensations.
• Alternate between your hands, lips, tongue, nose, chin, chest and anything else you can think of to avoid tiring and jaw aches.
• Use lots of lube. Saliva is great, but a water-based lube can be tasty, long lasting and provide a more slippery, fun surface.
• Pay attention to the scrotum (the sac containing the testicles), perineum, thighs and anus if your partner enjoys this type of stimulation.
• Partners: offer constructive feedback and lots of appreciation to let them know that you love it; if you're uncomfortable expressing how you feel with words, consider facial expressions, gestures and sounds of pleasure.
• Safer oral sex includes the use of condoms. Practice putting it on with your lips and tongue!

The Tease

1. Use your lubricated hands, moist lips, wet tongue and/or lubricated chest to softly caress his entire body,...

This post is a continuation from here...

Let's cover a few techniques that can be used during a vulva caress. Rather than simply thrusting your finger(s) into their vagina, consider a range of activities to explore areas that have a far greater capacity for sexual pleasure than the interior vaginal walls. As with all sexual activity, it is ideal to ask for verbal permission to proceed with each new adventure.

The Lip Liner

1. Position yourself comfortably between her legs while she lays on her back.
2. Apply lots of lube to your hands. See Astroglide for tasty lube.
3. Use your lubricated index finger to slowly and gently trace a line from her belly button down against her lips and back to her anus.
4. Start with your left index finger and trace along the side of her left outer labia (lip) and back up to her belly button.
5. Use your right index finger to trace along the side of her right outer labia (lip) and then back up to her belly button.
6. Take your time and repeat brushing against her...

This was by far my favourite session at Desire and I'm happy to share an excerpt from it below. This post just addresses a few vulva caress techniques, but in the workshops we discussed and explored the female body from head to toe with many exciting stops in between.

Let's begin with the Clitoris, which is more than the myth of a "tiny pea-sized bump rich in nerve endings" as it is often described in medical and anatomical texts. It is actually a complex system of over eighteen parts that are similar to the penis. Rebecca Chalker, author of The Clitoral Truth, explains that the penis is actually derived from the female sex organs which undergo change at about eight weeks in utero. Included in this complex system are:

Glans (or head, which is often referred to as the clitoris)

Hood (which covers the glans and may provide indirect pleasurable stimulation of the glans)

Shaft (a cord-like structure beneath the hood that swells during excitement)

Bulbs (erectile tissue similar to...

This post is continued from a previous post here...

As promised, I share a few techniques from my workshop Desire Resort. Bear in mind that the best sex is always subjective and these are just a few ideas to get you started...or keep you coming. Play with these a little, change their names and adapt them to suit what feels best for you.

Possible positions:

Rear View: Kneel over his abdomen with your back toward his face

Director's Chair: Kneel between his legs as he sits upright on a chair

Easy Access: Kneel/lay between his legs as he lays on his back

Try a few of these moves and let me know what you think!

The Licking Hand:

The Licking Hand is a nice way to get started and is really simple:

1. Use a flat, super-lubricated hand to simulate a licking tongue. Consider blindfolding him and using two licking hands to simulate a fun threesome.
2. Gently lick/paint the shaft, balls, head and inner thighs.

The Grand Slam Breakfast: pancakes, syrup and freshly-squeezed OJ:

1. Apply lots of...

As part of my initiation into the field of international sexology, I hosted the first set of human sexuality workshops at Desire Resort and Spa this month and they were a huge success. Participants were mostly couples, but a few singles attended the Hand Job session armed with a handy cucumber for practice. I had planned to provide dildos, but was warned that I may not make it through Mexican customs with 50 silicone penises. Given the red-light, green-light selection process at the Cancun airport Customs desk, I'm glad I was forewarned.

As promised, I share a few techniques from the workshop below. Bear in mind that the best sex is always subjective and these are just a few ideas to get you started...or keep you coming. Play with these a little, change their names and adapt them to suit what feels best for you.

Basic hand job tips:

1. Change positions often to avoid cramping.
2. Use lots and lots of lube. Check out www.GoodVibes.com for a yummy selection of the good stuff.
3. Apply...