World renowned relationship expert and best-selling author, Jessica O’Reilly, has signed on as Desire Resorts’ official sexologist. You may know Dr. Jess from PlayboyTV’s Swing, ABC Spark’s Love Trap or from the pages of Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health and Men’s Fitness, but she is also a huge fan of Desire Resorts. “This is one of the most exciting collaborations for the Dr. Jess brand and also one of the most obvious. Desire Resorts provide the perfect environment for couples to reconnect, both practically and intimately, so I’ve been sending couples to their facilities for years. I know from personal experience that even a few days at one of their resorts can completely transform a relationship.”

Dr. Jess first arrived at Desire Riviera Maya as a guest in 2006 and in 2008, she hosted her first couples’ workshop onsite. She now facilitates retreats, workshops and seminars at both locations several times per year. Her...

This post is intended for readers over the age of 18.

Hand jobs are not just for teenagers. Though I've written about the art of sensuous touch in the past, each time I visit Desire Resort and Spa, I pick up a few new tricks from the very adventurous and experienced couples who attend my workshops. I thought I'd post a few thoughts on how to make the most of lending a hand in the bedroom, at the theatre or under the restaurant table. (Please abide by local laws.)

As always, I'll preface this post by reminding readers that every guy is different (even if they all seem the same), so there are no sure-fire ways to bring him to the heights ecstasy. All I can offer are a few techniques to get you started. You can practice on a carrot or other vegetable, but don't get too hung up on technique. I always tell my workshops participants to do what feels good for them as opposed to focusing on my instructions. If you "screw up" and twist to the left instead of the right, don't worry about it...

Stop Here for Better Orgasms

In my private practice, I receive many inquiries from men asking for advice on how to last longer in bed. And though most women I talk to aren't looking for marathon-length sessions, we do appreciate the option to take our time and enjoy the experience. Learning to control your orgasm (for both men and women) is not only empowering, but can deepen sexual and orgasmic response. This is the first in a three-part mini series on making sex last longer.

The Stop-Start Method is a simple, sensual and orgasm-intensifying approach to lasting longer in bed. It simply entails doing whatever you love to do and stopping just before the point-of-no-return (or the point of ejaculatory inevitability for men). You don't have to stop stimulating your partner or yourself, but do stop performing the particular activity that makes you feel like cumming.

For example, if you're having penetrative intercourse, pull out (or have your partner pull out) and engage in some breast...

Here are a few general tips from the Fun With Fellatio session below...

• Change positions often to avoid cramping, vary your angle of contact and alter sensations.
• Alternate between your hands, lips, tongue, nose, chin, chest and anything else you can think of to avoid tiring and jaw aches.
• Use lots of lube. Saliva is great, but a water-based lube can be tasty, long lasting and provide a more slippery, fun surface.
• Pay attention to the scrotum (the sac containing the testicles), perineum, thighs and anus if your partner enjoys this type of stimulation.
• Partners: offer constructive feedback and lots of appreciation to let them know that you love it; if you're uncomfortable expressing how you feel with words, consider facial expressions, gestures and sounds of pleasure.
• Safer oral sex includes the use of condoms. Practice putting it on with your lips and tongue!

The Tease

1. Use your lubricated hands, moist lips, wet tongue and/or lubricated chest to softly caress his entire body,...

This was by far my favourite session at Desire and I'm happy to share an excerpt from it below. This post just addresses a few vulva caress techniques, but in the workshops we discussed and explored the female body from head to toe with many exciting stops in between.

Let's begin with the Clitoris, which is more than the myth of a "tiny pea-sized bump rich in nerve endings" as it is often described in medical and anatomical texts. It is actually a complex system of over eighteen parts that are similar to the penis. Rebecca Chalker, author of The Clitoral Truth, explains that the penis is actually derived from the female sex organs which undergo change at about eight weeks in utero. Included in this complex system are:

Glans (or head, which is often referred to as the clitoris)

Hood (which covers the glans and may provide indirect pleasurable stimulation of the glans)

Shaft (a cord-like structure beneath the hood that swells during excitement)

Bulbs (erectile tissue similar to...

This post is continued from a previous post here...

As promised, I share a few techniques from my workshop Desire Resort. Bear in mind that the best sex is always subjective and these are just a few ideas to get you started...or keep you coming. Play with these a little, change their names and adapt them to suit what feels best for you.

Possible positions:

Rear View: Kneel over his abdomen with your back toward his face

Director's Chair: Kneel between his legs as he sits upright on a chair

Easy Access: Kneel/lay between his legs as he lays on his back

Try a few of these moves and let me know what you think!

The Licking Hand:

The Licking Hand is a nice way to get started and is really simple:

1. Use a flat, super-lubricated hand to simulate a licking tongue. Consider blindfolding him and using two licking hands to simulate a fun threesome.
2. Gently lick/paint the shaft, balls, head and inner thighs.

The Grand Slam Breakfast: pancakes, syrup and freshly-squeezed OJ:

1. Apply lots of...

As part of my initiation into the field of international sexology, I hosted the first set of human sexuality workshops at Desire Resort and Spa this month and they were a huge success. Participants were mostly couples, but a few singles attended the Hand Job session armed with a handy cucumber for practice. I had planned to provide dildos, but was warned that I may not make it through Mexican customs with 50 silicone penises. Given the red-light, green-light selection process at the Cancun airport Customs desk, I'm glad I was forewarned.

As promised, I share a few techniques from the workshop below. Bear in mind that the best sex is always subjective and these are just a few ideas to get you started...or keep you coming. Play with these a little, change their names and adapt them to suit what feels best for you.

Basic hand job tips:

1. Change positions often to avoid cramping.
2. Use lots and lots of lube. Check out www.GoodVibes.com for a yummy selection of the good stuff.
3. Apply...