Trusting a lover is not always easy. We’ve all experienced some form of betrayal and even when we’re trying to mind our own business, news and rumours of sexual infidelity surround us.

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From neighbours and friends to celebrities and politicians, almost every relationship will be tested by the temptation or aftermath of a sexual affair. So how can you learn to trust your partner when you’re seemingly surrounded by marriage breakdowns and cheating spouses? Read on for my top three suggestions and feel free to add your own in the comments below.

1. Understand that supervision doesn’t amount to trust. Some lovers believe that having their partners check-in on a regular basis will affair-proof their relationships. Others try to spend every waking moment together as a form of supervision. The reality is that neither of these approaches works and failing to maintain some degree of independence can actually backfire and wreak havoc on a relationship. If you...

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Talking about boundaries and expectations also produces a perfect opportunity to discuss the potential for diversity or experimentation within all types of relationships. Clients who are interested in swinging often ask for advice on how to introduce the subject to their partners. While it is unlikely that most people will be open to a sudden change in relationship structure, asking your partners about their fantasies can create an exciting dialogue and produce shared fantasies and role play games that can be even more mind-blowing than the real thing.

But back to the question at hand: what is cheating? In short, cheating involves engaging in any activity (emails, text messages, telephone calls, physical intimacy, emotional companionship, etc.) to which your partners would not consent. A good starting point is to act in a similar manner both in the presence and absence of your partners. If they would be uncomfortable watching you act in a particular...