If You Don't Use It, You Lose It

Whether you're looking to last longer or just heighten your sexual experience, pelvic floor exercises are every sex-lover's best friend. Not only do they lead to more powerful orgasms, but they can also optimize sexual arousal, response, functioning and orgasmic control by increasing blood flow to the pelvic region and toning the muscles that support the pelvic organs and stabilize the core muscles.

The pelvic floor includes the two layers of muscles that sling from the tailbone in the back to the pubic bone in the front. To practice pelvic floor exercises, you first have to learn to recognize and isolate the muscles. There are a few ways to do this:

1. While peeing, stop the flow of urine. If you're able to interrupt its flow, you are contracting your pelvic floor muscles. You should feel a pulling-up sensation as opposed to the feeling of bearing down used during a bowel movement. (Though you can use this technique to learn to identify your pelvic...

Sex is a process. It's a beautiful, fun and wonderfully messy process that involves several stages of arousal and response. Orgasm (alongside desire, excitement, plateau, and resolution) is just one stage of sexual response, but it tends to get the most attention. Though orgasms can be great (sometimes better than great), they aren't always earth-shattering and shouldn't be universally regarded as the main event.

Sex is often reduced to orgasm alone and this can put undue performance pressure on both women and men. While I'm an avid fan of performance when it comes to sex, pressure should never be a part of the equation. Our nervous systems don't respond naturally or optimally when we're put under pressure and this lessens our ability to experience pleasure. Our sexual response cycle, which includes blood circulation, erection, lubrication and muscle relaxation, is also negatively impacted. I'm not suggesting we forget about orgasms all together, but simply that we focus on other...