I was recently interviewed on the topic of how social distancing will affect your sex drive and I’m happy to share my thoughts below.

1. How will staying home affect our sex drives?

This is a time of stress, uncertainty and transition and our responses to distress will vary greatly from person to person and from day to day. If you find that sex helps you to self-soothe, you might find that your sex drive is working overtime and you can’t get enough. If, on the other hand, sex is a source of stress or you’re experiencing tension in the relationship, you may have no interest in sex whatsoever.

All responses are perfectly valid.

This may not be a time to perform or achieve. Many of us are so emotionally drained that we’re just struggling to get by, so don’t feel pressure to have the hottest sex of your life. Instead, focus on your own well-being and look for ways to maintain connections aside from sex (e.g. physical affection, thoughtful conversations,...

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In this quickie episode, we chat about the fact that our interest in sex has declined since the onset of social isolation. We discuss strategies for creating “responsive” sexual desire and managing distractions that detract from pleasure.

If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible.

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Rough Transcript:

This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the...

The current situation is stressful for everyone and it’s normal to be worried and anxious. I like this 5-4-3-2-1 grounding approach by The Real Depression Project and I share a few more strategies to manage anxiety below:

1. Accept that some anxiety is normal right now and can be functional in that it motivates us to take the appropriate steps to protect ourselves and others.

2. Be realistic about your risk and consume information from credible sources as opposed to FB friends who have been “googling for hours”.

3. Take a break from the news and data. Pick a few times daily to check in, but consider avoiding the video updates that seem to pop up every hour (unless there is an urgent reason why you need hourly updates).

4. In addition to scheduling your news updates, consider taking a daily digital detox to unplug completely.

5. Consider soothing the physical signs of anxiety first. You can’t immediately *think* anxiety away, but a few deep breaths...

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Dating coach and matchmaker, Carmelia Ray joins Jess and Brandon to discuss:

• What holds most people back from finding a great match
• How dating has changed since we’ve been instructed to shelter in place
• Virtual speed dating
• How to ease into digital dating whether you’re a new couple or living long-distance
• How to manage the awkwardness of digital dates

As mentioned on the podcast, check out Carmelia's online dating programs on FirstDate.co. Follow Carmelia on Instagram, Facebook & Twitter.

If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible.

And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music...

Make “The Talk" an ongoing conversation.

Though you probably have more on your plate than usual right now, there are still opportunities to talk about healthy relationships with your kids — especially if you're streaming shows or movies. Turning to pop culture is one of the best ways to start conversations about difficult topics, as it's de-personalized; you can talk about storylines, jokes, language, relationships, specific on-screen interactions & character behaviour without making it about you or your kid.

If a topic or scene arises that makes you uncomfortable, it’s probably a sign that it’s worth talking about. Obviously the way you speak to a 15 year old will be different than how you address it with a 5 year old, but don’t gloss over & hope for the best. Even a five year old can observe that language is hurtful or that an interaction makes them feel bad. When we model and give them permission to talk about how they feel and what they like...

Meet this week's Sexuality Superhero, Olive Von Topp. Olive is a burlesque dancer, sexual educator and empowerment coach. Olive gives her clients the tools to strengthen their loving relationships, so they can move forward in their lives. She also uses her empowerment coaching values about self-confidence and 'owning your body', and executes them during her burlesque performances. Get to know Olive a little more by reading her feature below.

How did you find yourself working in sexuality?

Great question. It hasn’t exactly been a straight-line to get here. Like many people featured on this blog, I have always been fascinated by all things sexual. I had two older brothers and my mother always encouraged us to ask questions about sex if we had them, so I think I was exposed to some mature topics at an early age. I was always the one my friends came to with their questions about sex.

I even wanted to be a sex therapist (and still may go back to school for it at some...

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Since we’re trapped at home in isolation, we decided to record an extra episode this week. We talk about a fight we had yesterday and how stress levels are affecting the way we interact. We also spend some time discussing an unrelated user question: “Do I get a say in my partner’s porn use?”. We explore the difference between setting boundaries and dictating behaviour as well as specific communication prompts you can use to talk to your partner about porn. We also consider whether or not you should change your habits to meet your partner’s needs and concerns.

Please see below for a rough transcript of this podcast. 

Listener Question: "Do you get a say in your partner's porn habits?"

You have a say in terms of having the right to speak up about how you feel. You don’t have a right to dictate how they behave. And why would you want to? If they have a...

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We’ve been isolating at home in Toronto for 19 days now and we thought we’d share how we’re doing as a couple — what’s working and what isn’t. We talk about some of the conflicting feelings we’re experiencing and brainstorm ways to make sure we’re still feeling connected over the longer term (since this could last a while). We talk about how we respond to unsettling emotions like anxiety and share some ideas for daters who can’t connect in person. Thanks for listening.

If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible.

And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon...

Another week in self-isolation means it's time to get creative with your dating game. This week, Jess spoke to Carolyn and Jeff from Global TV's The Morning Show to discuss how we can date responsibility during the COVID-19 pandemic. Check out Jess' notes and video segment below!

Why has this time of social distancing proven to be such a popular time for dating apps?

Not only are we craving connection, but we also have more time on our hands, as we’re not commuting, socialising after work or hanging out with extended family. And we’re spending that extra time online.

Some dating apps are reporting increases in messaging between users and more time spent online.

Could the fact that people can’t meet in person actually be a benefit?

Being pushed out of our comfort zones and forced to communicate digitally can encourage us to learn new ways of communicating. Text alone eliminates the power of tone, body language and facial...

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• How she got over her body image issues after birth
• How to care less about what other people think
• The reconciliation of motherhood and sexuality
• The experience of stripping down at a nude spa
• The power of nude photoshoots
• Her new book: Effed At 40

Follow Tova on Facebook, Instagram & Twitter.

If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible.

And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher!

Rough Transcript:

This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This...