I was recently asked to share my thoughts on what it means to be sex-positive and I’ve shared an excerpt of the interview below. Feel free to chime in below in the comments, because this is just the tip of the iceberg and I appreciate your experiences and insights.

1) What is sex-positivity?

Sex positivity involves an attitude and approach to sex that minimizes moral judgments and honours personal agency and preferences. 

There are certainly differing definitions of sex-positivity. For example, some people claim to be sex positive, but their definition of moral sex is narrow — they may not have sex workers and trans rights. This is not sex positivity — it’s selective sexual freedom. 

My understanding of sex positivity includes respect, support and celebration of everything from abstinence to consensual non-monogamy and everything on the edges and in between. There are of course intersectional issues to consider when it comes to sexual agency —...

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Jess & Brandon complete the Sexual Values Questionnaire and continue learning about themselves and one another. They discuss how they feel about the physical, practical, emotional and spiritual components of sex. They also discuss sexual frequency and some of the challenges they personally face.

This podcast is brought to you by Desire Resorts.

If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible.

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Rough Transcript:

This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is...

Hot sex and earth-shattering orgasms don't always come naturally - you have to work for them and do a bit of learning along the way. Consider these approaches to increasing your odds of orgasm and remember that you don’t have to have an orgasm to have passionate and fulfilling sex:

Fantasize! Sexual response originates in the brain, so even if your body is getting what it needs, you have to feed your mind too or orgasm may elude you. It's not cheating to dream about Brad Pitt, Eva Longoria or the hot barista from the local coffee shop. In fact, if it turns you on and you eventually share your fantasies with your lover, it can deepen your connection.

Let your mind wander without inhibition. Who knows!? You might be a part of the estimated one percent who can have hands-free orgasms from fantasy alone!

Change positions. We all know that two-thirds of folks with vaginas do not orgasm from penetration alone, so shift into positions that allow you to rub, grind and rock to your...

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Happy holidays! In this episode, Jess and Brandon use the Sexual Values Questionnaire to explore their own sexual values. Brandon shares his experiences learning about sex and gender through sport, family and (Catholic) school and Jess shares her memories of what she learned about sex growing up. They don’t complete the full exercise, so it will be continued in next week’s episode.

Feel free to try the Sexual Values Questionnaire on your own or with your partner(s) using the following questions as discussion prompts:

1. What messages did you receive about sex growing up?
2. What messages do you wish to retain and which ones do you want to reframe/discard?
3. What does sex mean to you?
4. How important is sex to you?
5. What emotional components of sex do you value?
6. What physical & practical components of sex do you value?
7. What spiritual components of sex do you value?
8. How...

Meet this week's Sexuality Superhero, Todd Baratz. Todd is a NYC-based psychotherapist, shaping his client into their best sexual selves. Read his feature below and learn more about Todd!

How did you find yourself working in sexuality?

When I was 15 I started to see a psychiatrist who was also a sex therapist. He later has turned into a huge mentor and influence on my professional work. At the beginning of our relationship, he helped me develop language and comfort with my sexuality. He gave me the tools I needed to turn something that scared me--being gay and sexual--into something empowering. I found this to be incredibly helpful considering absolutely NO ONE else was talking about sex or expressing curiosity. The experiences I had in my own personal therapy shaped my intellectual pursuit of sexual education in my undergraduate, graduate, and post-graduate training.

What is the best part of the job?

My favorite part of what I do is the relationships I build with my clients....

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What are the most common issues couples fight about? How can you argue less and effectively manage conflict? How do you find middle ground when it comes to tough topics like money, sex and time? How can you support your partner over the holidays when they’re faced with family and sibling conflict? Jess and Brandon share their stories and sex therapist and psychologist Dr. Rachel Needle weighs in with her expertise.

Follow Dr. Rachel on Facebook, Twitter & Instagram.

To learn more about Modern Sex Therapy Institutes, click here.

This podcast is brought to you by Desire Resorts.

If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible.

And be sure to subscribe...

It’s that time of year again and though it’s supposed to be full of good cheer, the stress of shopping, cooking, planning, traveling and hosting can detract from the holly season — especially when houseguests are involved. This morning on Global TV’s The Morning Show, Jess sat down with Jeff and Carolyn to share insights on dealing with difficult house guests. 

Sherrie asks…

My boyfriend and I live together, but we’re going to visit his parents over the holidays and they insist that we sleep in separate rooms. How do we convince them that we’re adults and can share a bedroom?

Their house means their rules. You are adults and if you really want to sleep in the same room, you can book a hotel room.

I’m not suggesting that their motivation for separating you is more justified than your desire to sleep together, but if they’re graciously opening up their home, you have to adjust your behaviour to...

Bethany's mission is dedicated to reducing the stigma surrounding Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), and helping those who live with the condition. She aims to empower those living with DID, as well as those living with trauma, mental illness, and grief. Because of Bethany's amazing work, she is the perfect person to feature as this week's Sexuality Superhero. 

How did you find yourself working in sexuality?

In 2014, I was sexually assaulted. Without going into too much detail, I had been diagnosed with Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) the year prior, and my alters (Zache, Heinrich and Shoshanna) did what they were supposed to do – protect me. I reported the assault to the police, who investigated and charged my rapist. The police and the courts believed me, but I found myself without an advocate as social services did not. Their disbelief was more to do with my diagnosis than anything else. A forensic sex therapist offered her services pro bono when my...

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M'kali-Hashiki has a complex sexual history including personal experience with polyamory, non-monogamy, BDSM, and achieving mystical states during sex. She considers herself a “sexual outlaw”, as well as being a “triple minority” (Black, female, and queer); accordingly, she views society's standards on sexuality with a critical eye.

In this episode, we discuss:

• Erotic empowerment & breath work
• The difference between the erotic and the sexual
• How to be more grounded in your body
• The importance of “checking in” with the butthole and with the jaw
• Full-body orgasms

Follow M'kali on Instagram, Facebook & Youtube.

This podcast is brought to you by Desire Resorts.

If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your...

Your holiday to-do list may be bursting at the seams, but we can always squeeze in some extra intimacy. Though sex may not rank as a top priority during this busy season, it’s important to note that a little affection, connection and lovin’ may actually reduce your stress levels by lowering your blood pressure, boosting your immune system and increasing your energy levels.

Give these simple 12 Days of Christmas strategies a try and enjoy a happier, healthier holiday season:

Day 1: Give your honey a hand!

Brighten your lover’s day with with a sensual hand massage first thing in the morning. A quickie session lasting just 5 minutes will give you enough time to showcase your manual skills and cultivate an intimate connection that will last throughout the day. Use almond oil or a candy-cane scented hand cream as you stroke their fingers between your warm hands and swirl your thumbs in circular motions over their tender palms.

Day 2: Send a sexy card.

...