Intimacy means different things to different people. For some, sexual intimacy involves feeling loved and close to their partner. To others, intimacy involves an experience of spiritual or euphoric connection. For kinky folks, intimate sex might involve injecting elements of emotional or physical vulnerability.

However you define intimacy, consider these approaches to enhance your intimate connection with your lover.

Make eye contact. Research suggests that eye contact with a loved one results in a spike in oxytocin — the hormone that spikes right before orgasm and is associated with bonding. Eye contact during sex can intensify the connection, but it is not uncommon for people to avoid face-to-face positions on account of self-consciousness, discomfort or embarrassment. To ease yourselves into full eye-contact during sex play, start with the lights low or take turns wearing a blindfold as you become more comfortable with your natural facial expressions in response...

Before we get started, I want to direct you to an even better article about how to pleasure the clitoris and vulva. No bias here, I swear. OK — maybe I’m a little biased. I just love vulval pleasure!

But back to the topic at hand…

If you want to give the best blow job ever, my best advice to is talk to your partner about your desires and ask them to share theirs.

A rich body of research and a small dose of common sense reveals that talking about sex makes for better sex — no surprise.

Unfortunately, most of us are more comfortable having sex than talking about it.

But I want to talk about it. And I want you to talk about it. Because the uncomfortable conversations are often the most fruitful ones. And talking about sex often leads to sex and apparently people like sex.

Beyond the importance of open, non-judgmental communication, consider these practical approaches and techniques:

1. Be selfish. Focus on your pleasure rather than your performance. It’s...

The weekend is upon us and if you don’t mindfully carve out quality time with your partner, you may find that you only spend time together as roommates or co-parents.  Just as you have to plan and dedicate time to fitness, health and business, you need to specifically schedule time to be together as a couple. The beginning of the weekend is a great time to create a ritual that remind you both that you’re intimately connected — you don’t just live together, but you share an intimate bond that is worth nurturing.

Here are a few options for jump-starting your connection today:

1. Eliminate technoference. Put your phones in a box and place them in the car, a cupboard or in the basement. The mere presence of a cell phone (even if it’s in your pocket) detracts from connection, trust and collaboration, so invest in quality time with your partner at least once a week. You’ll naturally practice being present and mindful without distractions and this...

I hosted a We-Vibe and Womanizer event with Dr. Chris Donaghue last month in Toronto. He talked about the 7 myths of male sexuality in his presentation and wrote about it on Instagram. Check them out below.

Myth 1: If you don’t stay or get erect when you want, then you must have a dysfunction.

Healthy erections don’t always work. It’s not a disorder, it’s a natural variation in functioning. It's called erectile disappointment, not erectile dysfunction. Erections come and go. Don’t panic, and partners don’t take it personally!

Myth 2: Erections are required for sex.

Erections are not required for sex. Sex is about pleasure, and erections and penetration are not needed for this. When having an  erectile disappointment, use fingers, tongues, and toys. Sex is supposed to be fun!

Myth 3: Male sexuality is not fluid.

Nope, we are all more sexually diverse and fluid then we realize. Our sexuality is always evolving and changing. Toxic...

Meet our newest Sexuality Superhero, Caroline Colvin. Caroline is a sex and relationships writer for Elite Daily, discussing a range of topics from sexual health to gender and sexuality. Check out her feature below. If you want to learn more, scroll down to the bottom for multiple links to her articles. Happy reading!

How did you find yourself working in sexuality?

It happened by (very fortunate) accident. I always knew I wanted to write for marginalized communities, so I could use my gifts as a journalist to advance intersectional feminist causes. Whether in convos with peers or concerted efforts as an activist, I’ve always sought to destigmatize the body and sexuality. This past fall, I saw that Elite Daily had a few openings — one of them being a sex and dating writer. Given my journalism experience and my passion for feminism, it felt like a good fit. Come to find out, it truly is!

What is the best part of the job?

The best part of the job is the positive feedback I...

Sex is complicated and both its definition and meaning varies from person to person. But that doesn’t stop us from making generalizations and buying into sex myths that ultimately wreak havoc on our relationship and experiences of pleasure. It’s no surprise, of course, because comprehensive, inclusive sex education simply isn’t the norm in most schools and we aren’t born with sexual expertise.

A big part of my job as a sexologist entails debunking some of the sex myths that impede us from enjoying authentic sex including the following:

Men just want sex and don’t need as much love, attention or affection. They’re always ready to go.

Men are complex beings and you can’t make sweeping generalizations about billions of people. Some want a lot of sex and some want none at all. Research suggests that men desire affection, cuddling and foreplay as much as women.

They're happier in their relationships when they cuddle with their partner...

Meet this week's Sexuality Superhero, Reba The Diva! Reba's goal is to fill the gap for comprehensive adult sexual health education. She aims to provide a positive learning environment, focusing on self-pleasure first. She helps her clients build their sexual (and non-sexual) confidence, have better and more honest partnered conversations, and develops deeper connections amongst spouses. Check out more of this Superhero's advice below.

How did you find yourself working in sexuality?

I started out in sex toy sales for a popular MLM and I realized that before I could sell a toy to any of my clients, I had to educate them about their bodies and how pleasure works. I loved the education in what I did, but not the pressure to drive sales. So I quit and started a company of my own that is geared toward pleasure-positive sex education for adults.

What is the best part of the job?

The best part about my job is watching the transformation in my clients once they gain their...

I’m looking forward to speaking at this upcoming conference in North Carolina at the end of August.

Time: 8:45AM EST
Date: August 29th, 2019
Topic: Sex Education Saves Lives

Sex education is a rebellion that saves lives every single day. It is (part of) the answer to inequality, prejudice, oppression and human suffering and it’s far more simple than we make it out to be.

Program Objectives: 

• Assess the role sexual health and relationship education plays in physical and psychological health outcomes.
• Evaluate the ways in which sexual health and relationship education affects learners in terms of sexual orientation, gender identity and sexual identity.
• Critique sexual health and relationship education programs using an intersectional lens.
• Identify the role of sexual health and relationship education on diverse sexual expression and sexual communication (including digital and cyber sexuality).

Register here!

I was recently asked about equality in sexual relationships and how you can make your relationships really equal. I share a few thoughts below.

Equality may seem like a reasonable goal when it comes to sexual relationships, but you likely want to be flexible with regard to your definition of equality.

You don’t want equality to necessarily refer to sameness. For example, you can achieve relative equality even if one person has more orgasms. Similarly, if you go down on your partner or initiate sex more often, these may not be signs of inequality, but simply indications of personal preference. It can certainly be problematic when one person is disproportionately tasked with initiating sex, but in some cases this works for both partners and is equally fulfilling.

You likely don’t want equality to be measured by keeping score of sexual advances or efforts. Oftentimes our perception of what we give versus what we take is biased — especially when we are keeping score or...

Meet Dr. Wendasha Jenkins Hall. She is this week's Sexuality Superhero. Dr. Wendasha's mission is to help provide more concrete, science-based sexual health knowledge to those with limited resources. She offers a variety of sexuality consultation services, educational workshops and sex education programming to her clients. She aims to empower, inspire and transform these individuals into their best sexual selves. Read about her background and work below.

1. How did you find yourself working in sexuality?

I started this journey when I was 16 years old. At that time, I was trained as a HIV/AIDS peer educator by the local AIDS service organization in my hometown, Tallahassee, FL. That experience got my feet wet, but I was completely thrown in the ocean when I started grad school in Baltimore at Morgan State University. At the time I was on the path to becoming a mass communication/intellectual property lawyer, but I was assigned a graduate assistantship in the University’s...